January 24, 2017

Of Growing Up .... And Still Not Wanting To Grow Up!

If it weren't for cockroaches, I'd choose to retire in a beach house. 

On our recent trip to Thailand, The Husband and I were talking about where we'd like to build our retirement home. He picked icy mountains and me, the beach. What began as a harmless discussion soon avalanched into a heated discussion of where the retirement house actually would be. There's nothing that spells 3 years of marriage as much as these avalanched arguments do! Very soon there were defenses flying in from both ends, memories being brought alive from previous trips to the mountains and the beaches, each one wanting a desperate one-up against the other and then when all tricks were exhausted, The Husband came up with the last standing nuke in his arsenal - the C bomb!

"There'd be cockroaches all over your beach house, by the way.", he smiled. "It's a tropical country problem", he continued. It was just the morning after we were attacked by a huge cockroach in our hotel room and after scaring me, hid somewhere in the room, not to be found, leaving me to sleep completely covered under the blanket, lest the big brown monster attacked me in my sleep. And this won The Husband the retirement home. 

And I gave him the nastiest stare I could manage. He was right. He knew it and I knew it. He burst out laughing and I conceded to the mountain home, albeit one that overlooks the sea!  Yes, castles of Scotland would be apt, I know. We're open to accepting donations for our retirement home. PayTM accepted happily. Heck, if you really want to donate, I'll even accept the old 500/1000 notes!

It's just funny how some things don't change even when you grow up. 

Just like how I still need to show my ID proof even at 28! There was a time, when I really wished people stopped asking for my ID proof. It was embarrassing enough to be stopped at a casino at 24 when my 16 year old cousins would waltz past me, roaring with laughter. I even thought that there might be a police raid at my wedding and my Dad would have to show my birth certificate to prove the marriage is between legal aged people! Thankfully none of this melodrama happened at the wedding. So, digressions apart, from 24, an age, where one really wants be considered older than what they are, you suddenly cross the invisibly scary Quarter Life Crisis Line of 25 and all hell breaks loose. Till this line, all marketers are making a bee-line to woo you. After crossing this line, its all anti-aging creams and hair color brands promising 100% gray coverage chasing you. Yes, so you're in this why-did-I-grow-up/I-still-want-to-be-18/24 zone and a bouncer outside a pub asks you for your ID proof and you feel 18 all over again! Your happiness will know no bounds. This bouncer would have made your day with just one line - that you still look 18 or younger! So all the anger you had on all the bouncers who'd previously asked you for an ID proof vanishes in a minute and you have new found positive feeling towards them!

As for people who're wondering about the kind of brands behind women nearing 30 and 3 years married, please have a look at the pic below. 

Yes, showing are-you-pregnant/are-you-wanting-to-get-pregnant ads are so passe. Thank you Google, for acting like a nosy relative!

It's all a part of growing up, I guess. But as we're growing up, I feel society's evolving in reverse. No, I'm not referring to the kinds of ads shown to me, I'm over it. I'm referring to chat conversations of today, where words have been so easily replaced with emojis. Especially when The Husband does that, when what you're really expecting is a nice 3 paragraph reply and all you get is a smile smiley. It drives you nuts! I mean come on, how difficult is it to type, we don't even have the press-thrice-for-a-letter Nokia phones anymore! Our ancestors took millions of years to evolve from cave paintings to words and language, and we've so easily evolved back to cave paintings in a conversations via emojis! I think all husbands should definitely stop using them. Immediately. For Evolution's sake, if not their wives. I hardly think Husbands would do it for Evolution too, maybe if they got Dhoni's captaincy back in return, they'd do it! Men, phew!

This was my small bit to humankind and Evolution, this return to blogging. Hoping to seeing you'll more often :)

Let me know what you think!

P.S - sent the link to The Husband for what he thought of the new post. Guess what I got as a reply? Yes, a smiley 😊. There's no hope left for Humankind. Evolution in Reverse has begun!