July 25, 2011

Of Growing Up and ... Friends

I don't know what it is...is it our psychology or is it basic human greed to always find grass on the other side of the court greener. When I was in college, I wanted to grow up sooner and get out of college. And this was particularly worse in the last two semesters of my MBA course where I was just waiting for November and I wouldn't have to go to college any more (It's July, and I still have to go to college, courtesy my Sem 4 project....don't even get me started on it). And now, after almost 6 months of having starting to work, I envy the college kids with their pink BB phones I see in trains. Those, indeed, were lovely days. A time when life was a wonderfully well paid vacation. Ah, I so envy those days when my Dad would buy me a laptop and I wouldn't have to spend my salary on buying one!! And yes, there's an entire conundrum about how to file your income tax returns! Never knew growing up could suck so much!

When we were in school, I had friends whose head count ran in two digit numbers. After school got over, that number diminished, yet the two digit figure somehow sustained itself by random college friends, classes friends, friends of friends, friends of friends' boyfriends and so on.With the advent of Orkut and Facebook, the two digit number went to a good three digit number. I have some 400 odd friends on Facebook and I haven't spoken to 380 odd of them in years! And I don't see myself speaking to them in the future too. And these were all 'good' friends of mine at some point. Yes, I am very selective about whom I add!! You read my Wanna Make Fraandship series right! And I don't know why I don't talk to them anymore. What has happened that most of them have stopped resonating with me.

I am known to have a lot of bestfriends. Right now, I have 6 of them. They were 11 until two years back. And even of the 6 BFFs I have today, I see 2 of them slowly slipping away. Other 2 of these 6 are guys, so at some point either I will move apart from their lives or they'll move apart depending on who gets married first! So, I'll be left with only 2 then. So, in sum, out of 440, I'll be down to 2 friends!! And that's a scary picture to envisage! Sometimes, the only reason why you want to stop time is to maintain the status quo you have with your friends and preserve it in time. 

Like a typical teenager, I never listened to my Mom and she ended up giving me a lot of  'Talk to me when you're my age' looks and I gave her the 'Whatever' looks. And she told me, that this would happen, that one day everyone will get busy with their own lives and you'll be left to deal with yours on your own, and I refuted her claims by saying that I'll always have people. And I feel like going and telling my Mom how right she had always been. I know people grow up, they start working, get in and out of relationships, have new bosses and mothers-in-law and exes and exes of current to deal with and they get only a weekend for the same and then asking the same person to take some time out for you, is a little unfair. I also would want to finish my quota of sleep before I dash to meet my friends! But, there are some people without whom you just can't do and life is at its best when the people for whom you feel so, also feel the same for you and actually go out of their way to keep you a part of their lives. I'm glad, that I have 6 such friends.I hope I have these 6 for as long as I can. And of these 6, there's one who's posted in a tribal area of Maharashtra and he still finds network enough to call me once a week. Who wants a boyfriend, when you have a few friends who take so many pains to just talk to you! 

P.S 1 : I still wouldn't mind a boyfriend...any rich, single, handsome, intelligent Gujju reading this, please feel free to contact me!

P.S 2 : Posting for the first time from my new laptop...yeah the one I paid for myself....and it feels great!

P.S. 3: Growing up isn't about getting over Twilight and Harry Potter. Growing up is about maintaining your BFFs come bosses, exes and mothers-in-law!!

P.S. 4: Again, for the first time, I'm posting something that I've not read again, not proof read, not checked for spelling/grammar errors. I've written whatever my fingers typed. And I don't care of its shitty. After a real long time, I don't care about what people have to say about me or about what I write!

P.S 5: I'm not drunk! This post is just an after effect of being sick of calling up many numbers to 'Waiting Active'!


aafs88 said...

True that! In the end, the scores of friends does not really matter.. Even 1 is enough who can get your back in time of distress, and share d smiles and happiness.. :) Nice post..

Samudra said...

I dont know what to say.

Except... "envisage"?!!!! Really??! :D

I dont think growing up is not about keeping BFFs come blah blah, but more of acknowledging that people change, and having the courage to change yourself, while remaining true to your own values and not forgetting the past.

Lakshmi Prabhu said...

congo on the big buy with ur own paycheck!which one which u get?..btw totally agree with ur experience of people growing up together and also some growing up and growing apart..

Abhishek Ghosh said...

congrats on your laptop... nice as usual

spirit.alive91 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
confused soul said...

Pretty new to your blog...

I really liked this post ... I realized the same thing a while back... Mom's are always right ya... I miss some of my friends, but then again I think it was just meant to be like it...

God knows what's in store for the future... Lovely post :)

Vinod said...

your best blog in a long long time!

disha said...

i liked this one...its true and its sad....but some friends do come back again and may be become 'better friends' after a while and there are some who are miles away or may talk once in a while but u always feel the connectivity

I liked the earlier look of the blog better! :)

Eham said...

Growing up is also about keeping your childhood obsessions right where they belong... in broad view!!
Just today was telling my friends in final year to enjoy the time they have left.. Sigh!

And I kinda agree with Disha, this blog template is a little difficult to read

Anonymous said...

De nada!

Pritam said...

Good post... lots of calculations but stills bonds with the reader. waiting for the next post. Loyal reader in true sense. :P