You Know You've Started Earning When....

You know you've started earning when

1. Your entire life depends on catching the 8.43 Churchgate slow from Andheri
2. You start having your breakfast in train. More imprtantly, you start having breakfast in the first place!
3. You know it's a festival day when you see an empty train!
4. Big festivals become more important to you than your birthday!
5. Your Facebook status updates have a lot of 'train' mentionings! {People, please be considerate when you criticise my train stat-ups....all that a single person can do in trains is tell the world about train travel}
6. Your phone becomes the be all and end all of life. You can make/recieve calls/messages, you can come online, you just can't blog so you start wanting a BlackBerry! {This post has been written as a draft SMS on my phone! So, if you want to read more blogs, please contribute generously to my BlackBerry Fund... read ahead about it}
7. For non bloggers, you start longing for a BlackBerry because now, you can afford it. Ok, whom are we kidding, it's just the freaking peer pressure to get one!!
8. Your Facebook addiction remains the same, just the means on coming online changes!
9. Your daily one-hour phone calls to your BFF is now a 10-minute call on weekends!
10. Your sleep is more dear to you than meeting friends.
11. You have to placate your friends by promising to go on a only-you-and-me date with them because they are upset with you for not having time {Sweta, this one's for you!}
12. You stop wearing red nail-polish, something that was a part of your identity {sob sob}
13. You move on to giving career advice from giving love/life gyaan! And people think you're really smart! Hehaw!!!
14. You know understand why your Dad and uncles paid so much attention to the Financial Budget every year
15. But still, the only thing yhat you are interested in the budget is knowing the tax slabs! And it hurts to pay 10 percentage points more tax than your friends. But you always have other friends who pay 10 percentage points more tax than you, so that's comforting!
16. You've never cared about the money pocketed by politicians until you see your salary with TDS!
17. You still have no clue where your hard earned money goes.... in someone's Swiss account, in making education free for rich OBC/ST/SCs, in making a bridge for 15 years, in redeveloping slums that still look the same, you're as clueless as a child in a topless bar!
18. You get to know aate dal ka bhav!
19. For people who've been reading my story, if you want to read further, please contribute for my BlackBerry fund, because that's the only way I'll be able to write. For people who've been reading, loving, going bonkers over my blog, you also, please do the same. If you guys can spend 200 bucks on mindless entertainment like Dabangg, you can definitely spend 500 bucks for intellectual entertainment from me! I accept only cash. Counterfeit notes not accepted! {I don't want to waste my hard earned salary on a phone, hence the fund!!}
20. The only time you have in a day to read the 52 unread messages you got during the day is on your way back, in train!! {Yes, I have a lot of fan mail...oops, fan messages to reply to!}
21. How much ever you don't like or don't want it to happen, money gets onto your head. A little bit does!!

Wow! So now the lady sitting across me thinks I have a boyfriend because I'm on the phone since I got in. Lady, I'm blogging and that's way cooler than having a boyfriend.... when you have a boyfriend, you have only one fan, but when you blog, you have a lot of fans!!  So, this post is dedicated to you, Miss. Lady Sitting Across Me..... I don't have a boyfriend.... but if you are rich and have a hot 25 year old son, I may be interested! I won't mind a lot of fans + 1!!

You Know You're A Graduate When...

This post is dedicated in the loving memory of all those school years, when everyone asked you to enjoy them, but you were only interested in looking forward to the glamorous college life. By the time you're settled in college, you're too sick of the system, cramming and everything to do with education and you want to show your talent to the world. And by the end of the entire process, you're heard telling this to your school going(near to exiting school) cousins, "School life is, infact the best period of one's life..... "And again, they don't listen to you and the vicious cycle continues. Sorry for such a useless start, what I wanted to say in this post is how you can identify a graduate amongst a crowd of people.

1. They're almost always frustrated in life. The reasons for which vary maybe one of 

• My life sucks, but girlfriend doesn't. ( a guy reason for frustration)
• My boyfriend's such a jerk... he's never there when I need him... his IPL is more important.. his football with friends is more important...everything is more important than me... I know he doesn't love me anymore.... all men are alike.... blah blah blah... (a girl's reason... I've deleted the other 9 of 10 parts of the rant for the lack of space here.)
• WTF?!?! I'm 20... and STILL single?!? Where have all the dudes gone? So here goes my dream of having a love marriage!! (Aanchal and my reason!!)
• Will I get 632/700 or 630/700..... It's all in two marks that I'd come second and not first....I'm tensed!! (Toppers' reason! Losers!!)

     2.  They're almost always confused in life. The reasons for which maybe one of

• What to wear today....  baby pink top on lavendar capris or a classic white one?? (The (ex)college babe's reason)
• Whom to say yes to..... guy 1 or guy 2 OR (options don't cease for them) guy 3..!! (Almost all my female friends' reasons! Trust me, even if they pass me like 10% of the guys they have, I'd have  a new guy to go out with every evening for atleast 3 months... and I'm NOT exaggerating... I had actually calculated the numbers!!!!)
• Now that I didn't get through MBA.... what the hell do I do with my life!! Job?? But where? Or Masters??From where...oh no... more entrances!! Marriage... uhh forget it... out of question! Sit at home... Suits fine!!! What do I do?!?! (This is also a reason for frustration, forgot to mention there...Anyways, this is well, my entire MBA gang's reason... if you read in the papers about mass suicides, in all probabilities, it'll be us!)
• What do I watch today.... MI 3 or The Bourne series?? (Aanchal's reason!!) I say, Top Gun Aanch... I'll come too, again!! (BTW, Tom Cruise can cause female genocide with that smile of his in this movie.. and that inverted dive with the MiG..!! Man!!!!!)
• Whom do I really really fall in love with today... Irfan or Brett?? (My reason!)

     3. They're almost always in hatred with someone. They most hated list comprises of..

• Their almost illiterate relatives who give out career advice like they're Sameer Barua or something.
• Again, their relatives, who keep on perstering them with: So what're you gonna do now?? Job?? Where?? Why not here?? Why there??It's not that good...What kind of pay would you get?? What're the working hours?? All this even before you've decided if you wanna work or rot at home.
• Their aunties, who's only aim in life is to see you get married. Even if the last time she met you was when you were in Huggies. And the love she has for you is only a little more than what Bhajji has for Symonds' mother.
• Their parents, for, they continue to think that they're good for nothing and totally useless, even when that's not the case! And they also pester you with the same questions as the relatives do. Do all these 45+ do a diploma course in irritating 20 years or what? No offence to parents... but sometimes they should give the kids some time to figure things out...!! But then, afterwards you realise that like always your parents were right, yet again!!
• Their siblings... because you're really useless and jobless right now, they make you do all their work, they treat you like a piece of shit(which they always do) and they kick you out of your OWN room because they want to study!
• Their friends, because they continue to show no signs of growing up since their Huggies days... they're as juvenile as before... the only comforting factor being that their toilet habits aren't as juvenile!
•  One more reason for hating friends is that their exams begin the day yours got over!! If there are 3 best friends, never should the three separately take up Biotech-Pharmacy-Engineering.... trust me, you'll never be able to meet each other for 4 years... because of the other idiots' 4 yr courses!
• The IPL team they supported.... because they almost never win! Murphy's Laws, I tell you!
• The book they last read ... because it got over!!! I mean books with characters like Edward Cullen should go on and on and on and on and on forever!! (Extra info: Twilight is much better than Harry Potter!!)
• Your couch.... it isn't as fluffy now, as it was when your vacations began!
• Orkuters and Facebookers and MSNers... no one comes online!!! These places used to be packed during exams!! 

P.S 1: Sorry for the language in this post... it's obscene!!! I'm totally frustrated and that's evident!!

P.s 2: Aanch, thanks for the idea of this post!!