Wretched Luck....!

"Jab dil hi tut gaya....toh jee ke kya kare.... jab dil hi tut gaya...." " Na koi umang hain, na koi tarang hain.... meri zindagi bas ek kati patang hain.." "Kya se kya hooooo gaya tere pyaar main" and my favourite of all of them, "Dil ke armaan aasuon main beh gaye!!!" These are the only songs playing on my iPod since Lucky broke the news of IRFAN PATHAN getting MARRIED to his girlfriend.I HATE MY LIFE and MY WRETCHED LUCK!

Girlfriend!!! When did that happen?? The papers say they first met in 2003.... precisely the time when I first saw him! And she's not even pretty! She's fat! Yeah, do you get the point now, that I DON'T like her! Dil ke armaan aasuon main beh gaye.... Couldn't he find someone better? Like me? (Don't laugh... I may not be as pretty as Ash or hot as Jessica Alba.... but I'm definitelty not FAT at least!) {Nothing wrong in being fat, I infact love fat people (sacchi, God Swear... eww...I need to stop spending all my free time with 8 year olds!) ... I'm just finding an excuse not to like Shivangi Dev}

Only when I think that the color of the mehendi that I've put on my hands is the darkest of dark browns making me think that someone somewhere is madly in love with me (lifted straight from Dil Toh Pagal Hain), I come to know that Irfan's hooked! I was sad all day because of it.... until Aanchal called up and gave a proof of why I love her so much! She said that Irfan's Dad has apparently said that Irfan won't get married until Yusuf doesn't get married!!! I almost touched my ceiling with the jump I jumped with joy.... and considering the fact that I'm just five two (fine, I'll be honest... five one and a half!), that was some jump! And I so hope that Yusuf doesn't get married soon!!! How selfish can I get!! By the way, you should've seen the show Aaj Tak had for Irfan Pathan... it was funnier than 16 guys fighting to woo and marry Rakhi Sawant (again, what's wrong with lesser mortals like me?)

If you thought that my wretched luck got over, you got it wrong.... I can beat anyone in this department (Ajay is not allowed to compete with me, his luck is worse than mine!) a movie that I've making for almost 2 weeks for my nana-nani's 50th wedding anniversary to be played in front of a 150-odd people at the party, refuses to play! And I almost say the F word due to utter exasperation in front of my family... then managing to make it sound like Freak later! God alone knows how I remade it in 20 minutes again! And people loved it, so mission accomplished.... so at the end of it, I earned 550 bucks for it, for practically nothing...and already have 2 more movies to make for some relatives! I can make money from this now!

C'est la vie!!

P.S: It's Aanchal's birthday tomorrow and apparently, I'm more excited about it than her!! Aanch... HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

P.S 2 : Read my story... the links are on the right side above the Edward Cullen slide show

Dazzled!!

What dazzles me more? My eight year old cousin discussing the bullion trade with me or me successfully making a scrapbook for Aanchal without any pictures?? Blame it on the Libran indecisiveness or anything, I’m really confused at what really dazzled me last this week!

I’ve heard that American IQ is age divided by 10…. But I guess, that an NRI second generation IQ is age multiplied by 10!!! I was at a loss of words when an completely innocuous discussion, one wherein I was explaining my eight year old NRI cousin how 100 Rupees is not much…. It’s just about $2… just completely turns 360 degrees when my cousin, the same eight year old, starts talking about how an economy loses value if it starts printing more bills!!! My jaw touched the ground when my cousin said this! He’s an eight year old for crying out loud…. He’s supposed to be discussing Wii and PSPs and not the American economy!! To be honest, I never understood this concept of how inflation, printing more money and the gold reserve thing are all inter-related when I had asked my Dad when I was in 4^th grade as to why doesn’t the government print more money and distribute it!! I understood it now, when I read it for my PIs! And my eight year old cousin also knows the American share price for Honda Motors and when he plays the ‘name countries’ game with me, he names countries like El Salvador, Chad, Lebanon, Micronesia and the likes, when I’m not getting over India, Pakistan, Italy and France!! And he knew Claude Monet’s style of painting at a time when I couldn’t even pronounce Monet right! (The ‘t’ is silent….. damned French!!) He doesn’t cease to dazzle me everday! I’m thinking of taking him with me to my PIs…. Maybe the panelists will give me admission on the basis of pedigree… I’ve tried going the marks way(and failed too!). These NRI kids are way smarter than their Indian counterparts! I wasn’t this smart when I was eight…. And I’m just assuming that I’m smart to begin with!!

I haven’t mentioned Aanchal in my blog since a long time, and I don’t want her to go in a depression thinking that I’ve forgotten her (our date’s on, Aanch… I’ll see you at Sahara Star on the 1^st!). I was supposed to make a surprise scrapbook for her 21^st birthday because she had asked me to do it! What an innovative way to surprise! And though, I kept telling her I won’t do it, I did it…. The quintessential best friend that I am!! And it’s turned out nice…. I’m a self confessed-self obsessed person, but still, I normally don’t brag about myself, but this scrapbook is looking really nice, because she never expected me to remember all her friends…even if she mentioned them just once in the 3 years that I’ve known her…. Yeah she’s got a pathetic memory herself… she forgets that I’ve got a Pentium IV built in my grey cells… I don’t forget things!! Aanch, make your list of 34 people…we’ll check if your list and the people in the scrapbook match! And, Thanks Aanch, for bringing out the creative painter in me…. I’d almost given up, but then the thing of doing the scrapbook entirely by myself made me do the art work too…. And I hope you like it (Radhika did the initial few… and later I almost traded her a lifetime of slavery from myside for her to do the rest as well!!) And Wow! I’m discussing your scrapbook here, when I know you’re gonna read my blog (you dare stop reading my blog, now that you’re into a B-school and all that!). I know, you’re spying on my mailbox to see who all are writing…. At least erase the evidence of the spying later on! The scrapbook doesn’t have a single pic….. trust me, you don’t know how excruciatingly painful it has been for me to keep no pics! I just want to see you smile on your birthday…. I hope the scrapbook is what you have imagined for yourself… if not, find new friends….!!

I’m very happy these days , now that my Mom’s finally given up and now I’m allowed to paint my nails red, black, blue and purple!! Yay!! My nails are half red and half black right now…. I’m thinking of opening a nail bar or something…. I think I can make money by this nail obsession of mine! Anyone interested in financing?? Maybe Aanchal, after she gets placed!!!

P.S : Listen to the song Total Eclipse of The Heart by Bonnie Tyler. It was one of the top 10 romantic songs…. So needless to say… it’s an amazing song…. Never before have I heard something like Once upon a time I was falling in love… and now I’m only falling apart… there’s nothing I can do to the Total Eclipse of the heart…!! This song has the most heart toucing lyrics…. This is the only song I listen to at full volume even when the singer is singing in high pitch! Gives me goose bumps, this song! Do tell me if you liked this song…!

Nails!!!

It's one of those unusual times when my sister is wondering if she's dreaming.... because I have a nail cutter in my hand.... to cut my own nails, that too voluntarily, without any 24 hours ultimatums from Mom to cut my nails, lest they be cut by her when I'm sleeping!! I hate this! I hate my life! Why do your nails grow so beautifully till one day, and the very next day after someone's appreciated them, do they have to chip.... right where your skin's attached to it...making you go through excruciating pain while cutting it.... both physical and emotional?!? Just like the emotional trauma I feel now, when I can't absolutely say that I love Irfan Pathan.... only because Edward Cullen flashes in front of my eyes. Why God, why? Why me?? Below is a picture of my nails....before I cut them! I'm sorry if it scares the faint hearted.... it always scares my sis!!

 

I don't get why my family hates my nails? I've even stopped scratching my sister (after of course she bled a lot many times!!) but then nails are my only defense mechanism , given that my punches/slaps/kicks don't hurt people. They don't even hurt mosquitoes, if I were to hurt them...!! So, now till 2 months, irritate me as much as you want.. I'm defenseless!! There are a lot many disadvantages of having nails though....like not being able to open jars, drawers etc... but, you've always had the physical strength of a 2 day old, so no one expected you to be able to open these any ways! The other disadvantage that has people concluding that you're in a relationship and you've gone all the way only because you're covered in bruises and scratches every morning! They don't even have the patience to have a look at your nails....!! I always get suspicious glances from my Mom....!! She seriously needs to look at other kids to know what a Tulsi I am!!

I've also stopped doing something that's again gonna shock my family beyond imagination.... I've decided to finally stop advicing people and playing Cupid.... I have to admit that I've lost my touch.... my advices don't work anymore! I guess the human race has evolved a lot after I did my psychoanalysis on it to have a better knowledge of both the sexes!! Jokes apart, I really don't understand why do the love stories I REALLY want to work out don't.... and the ones I'm... well... not so desperate about them working out.... work...and they work like hell!!! They don't even deserve it!! So, now after seeing the heartbreak of someone whom I didn't want to see in that way ever, I've finally taken the call on not playing Cupid ever!!! My friends will have to find a new Hitch for themselves! So, now, I'll have to be happy by having only one love story to boast about. The only love story that worked because of me and leave alone being grateful, people don't even remember things, otherwise they could've given 10 minutes of listening for the 3 years of their relationship that's working!! Anyways, I was wondering if I could put this on my resume....Playing Cupid.... may work, what do you think?

 

I think I'm on my way of getting over Edward Cullen! Finally!! But, I still remember how my face lift up when a friend asked me who's Edward Cullen!! Seriously, this guy, Edward is something! I just can't get over him!! And he even makes appearances in my dreams and give a lot of laughing matter for my friends! I was so depressed last week, when the W key got off from my keyboard.... and I couldn't write EdWard without a W! My keyboard reminds me that I underestimate myself a lot... I'm not technologically dyslexic that I thought I was.... for I can get my printer software working even when the computer walla failed....!! I seriously can teach these computer engineers a thing or two! So now, I've got one more thing to brag about!

 

P.S 1: I hate Dhoni.

 

P.S 2: Please listen to the song Lion by Rebecca St-James. It is from Chronicles of Narnia. Although it's from this movie, it really suits the Twilight thing... Especially Edward..... he's THE LION any lamb wouldn't mind falling in love with!! Feels like I'm living in a lion's mouth, but the lion is an angel.

The Need For Twilight Rehab!!

About two things I am absolutely positive,

First, Edward is a vampire and

Second, I am unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him!

Yes, Its gone to that stage... the stage where one needs some serious rehab!! I tried to keep away from the Twilight series after I finished the last printed book, Breaking Dawn, but the withdrawal symptoms set in....and compelled me to read The Midnight Sun, the fifth unfinished book in the series which has been leaked on the net! And this half, unfinished version is the best of all the books.... because it has the entire story from Edward's point of view, which is well...... I don't know what word to use because, honestly I've never believed that a guy like HIM can exist!! Just too good to be true.... can exist only in books, movies and in your best friend's life (you can't even snatch him, Damn!!)! Bella correctly said in Twilight when Edward asks her if she's scared of him because he's a vampire... and she says, "I was wishing that I could believe that you were real. And I was wishing that I wasn’t afraid if you said you weren't!!!" I admit, I spend a lot of time on www.twilightquotes.com !! I'm just so hopeless and completely jobless too!!

There are some amazing lines from the book though.... actually one per page! But some of the absolute gems have to be

Forbidden to remember, terrified to forget- Bella Swan in New Moon, when she's trying to get over the fact that Edward's gone forever and she can't make herself remember him and his memories... and she fears that if she doesn't remember him, she'll forget him!!

Edward : And the lion fell in love with the lamb

Bella: What a stupid lamb..

Edward: What a sick masochistic lion!

Edward: Could a dead, frozen break? I felt mine could, When he thought that Bella'd like someone else and not him,... (only a certified loser would do that!), thinking when he was in Bella's room watching her sleep, surreptiously... not in a peeping Tom manner...but in a very cute way!

Bella: Edward... Edward... Stay please.... don't go, murmuring in her sleep, dreaming about him.

Edward: Could a dead, frozen heart beat again? It felt mine was about to, speaking to himself, not believing what he'd just heard!

But this one video takes my heart. I have to watch it every time I switch on my laptop!It's my personal brand of heroin, cocaine rather... or whichever is more potent!

If you didn't catch the words, I'd be more than glad to help you!

Bella: Everybody's staring...

Edward: Not that guy.... he just looked! Putting his hand on her shoulder, I'm breaking all the rules now since I'm going to hell!!! *My heart misses more than one beat!! *

Now, the above post for all those who haven't read the series, please do it ASAP! For the people who have, here's a checklist for you to judge if you need Twilight and Edward Cullen Rehab

• You've read and re read Twilight
• You're watching the videos
• You saw the MTV awards and still like Edward and Bella inspite of the stoned/doped appearances of the lead actors!!
• You've joined all possible fan clubs of Edward Cullen
• You've got your friends addicted to Edward Cullen too (I've got Aanchal, Radhika, Ajay and trying to get Manshi addicted now!)
• You've joined the Human boys have lost their charm because of Edward Cullen group in Facebook!
• You're seriously not interested in lesser mortal guys now!
• You try to read minds!! ( I was trying to read my sis' mind, but she thought I having a dyslexic moment registering her words!)
• You almost ask your Mom if you could go hunting and not eat the food she cooked! ( I shudder to think what would've happened to me had I said this thought aloud in my Jain home!!!!)
• You read the book with your mobile backlight when there's a power failure in your house at night.
• You actually dream about Edward, Bella, the vampires and Jacob in your sleep!
• You notice people's canines more carefully!
• You try really really hard ot write a spoof on it, but you just can't get your thoughts coherent enough the minute your neurons register the noun Edward!! (also because you're missing the Cell Biology lectures.... as the teacher's incoherent lectures were the inspiration for all your creative articles... only if I could attend one more of her lecture, I'd write the spoof on the entire 4 book series, trust me!)
• You think of writing your version of the continuation of the series for your best friend's upcoming birthday!! (But you can't as she has told you what suprise gift she wants from you, and damn it you've not even started anything in that area!)
• You write a full blogpost on Twilight!!

If the answers to the above questions is in the affirmative, then you need REHAB! Come, join me! We'll think of doing something to get over Edward! Is there anyone who hates Edward...? Could you join us too.... just to make sure we get over him... and not form a fan club!!!

P.S: I'm back with a bang! Yo!!

P.S: Read the third chapter of my story here

Chapter 2 here

Chapter 1 here

My Best Friends...

The last time I wrote something on this topic was an essay for my English class in 4th standard.... around 11 years back! And now, at 20.8 years, I'm all charged up to write on My Best Friends... people who're responsible for taking care of me outside the sheltered confines of my family. Radhika, Rao, Aanchal and Ajay are the heroines and hero of my post. It's really personal to talk about my equation with them, but then, today, I'm just so happy after a looooong time and they're the reason behind it! So, it's them all in the way on my blog!

I've never really talked about my equation  with Radhika and Rao ever on my blog. There's no need for it, because somehow I feel that the relationship we have transcends words, because I, honestly don't have words for them. From listening to the same old stories of mine for 1000 times and still being game for it for the 1001 time, Rads, you seriously have some patience man! And you never even interrupt me and tell me the count of the incident that I'm regaling to you! And you're the sweetest person along with Akshata.... because you two are the only two people on Earth who laugh like crazy on my jokes and make me feel that I'm good at being funny! From being the only friend I had for almost 3 months..from wiping and consoling and saying the same things over and over again without getting frustrated for 4 years ...to having the guts to put up with a 2 hour-every day crying person for 3 months , to still putting up with my BYEs when I'd be with him, leaving you in the lurch! I couldn't have asked for a better best friend! 

Rao.... I know you still hate me for eating that Fruit and Nut which was meant for someone else, but dude, you should've researched before giving a gift to the girl you were planning to ask out! I can't help it if she doesn't like chocolates and I'm the chocoholic best friend of hers! But, seriously, the way you used to come online late at night only because I was lonely in US with no one online during my 'awake' hours.... that meant so much to me! Trust me, the chocs I got for you from there were nothing for what you'd done for me in those 3 months! From hating to a person, not beacuse he didn't like you, but because I had cried for him.... to listening to my Eostrogen mood swings every three days.... you come next to Rads in the patience-o-meter!! 

Aanch...I call her my soul-sister. The only place where we differ is that I'd be cool with a not-so-tall guy unlike her!! From liking the same guys to fighting over them (well, more like me abusing her because she'd be the one who'd go and talk...just taking advantage of the fact that I can't really talk to people I like!) to crying one after the other.... almost everytime... ain't it... one week you... one week me! And of course celebrating our first-time-meeting anniversary on 10th Aug! There are so many instances with her that it'd be an encyclopedia when penned down! From the way we both felt that 'void' no one else did at Hyatt's coffee shop the day after my birthday ....by just the way our eyes drifted away while talking....to keeping that hand on my head at the Suncity bus-stop with me trying so hard to tell you things but just couldn't get myself to talk about it... to fighting over Mohali and Chennai.... to keep gushing over Edward Cullen and various other hunks (except Nauman and ZAc Efron...I hate them, they're **y!)... to making deals over extra-marital affairs with the other's husband... to snatch the other's baby name, the baby's place in the Indian Cricket Team (jersey no 11!!)... to promising to snatch only my temporary pyaar and leaving my permanent pyaar all for myself...to rolling your sleeve in the middle of the road to bash up the epicenter of all my troubles.... to that one conversation at the Window sill in Vapi at 3 in the morning, that just showed me how strong a person I've been and which changed my life. Forever. Thanks for forcing me to talk that day.... I would'nt have been able to write about Ajay otherwise! And if I don't get the first call after your water breaks from your hubby.... I'll run away with him while you're still in labour! Remember my warning!!

Ajay was the third particpant of Aanchal and my Window Sill convo at Vapi... during our IV there....well, like I said, the night of 13th Jan .... changed my life, for good. I got a new best friend!! From keeping me sane one month before the Boards so that I could write my exams (yeah, and then giving me murderous looks when I'd taken a supplement!!)... to clearing my head every 5 hours everyday during March.... to being on mute conference for 3 hours so that I wouldn't break down while talking... to wanting to massacre everyone I knew at one point of time because they all were only aggravating things and not alleviating pain... to always be the one who'd get a smile on Aanch's and my face....and of course.... for getting Aanchal and me to abuse and think cheap....People tried, but couldn't do it for 2 years... but you did it in what...2 days?! Shit man! You're going to hell, Ajay! BTW, you owe me a Fruit and Nut for 15th March!

And if you don't pick up my calls in 5 rings after you get married or move in with your girlfriend (if you're lucky to land one!) because you were busy.... you'd get a kick from me on your self-proclaimed callipygian ass! (I wanted to kick in a more strategic position but then, I want you to give me a niece so that I can name her something that doesn't sound like FLICKA! It seriously sounds like a shoplifter's name!)

For people who've read this, must be wondering what a sad person I am....to be crying all the time..! But no, it was just the past 5 months which have been bad.... only because Murphy's Law came into picture..... every bad thing possible....happened....at the worst possible time! But now, I'm back...to my old self.  Thanks to Ajay and Aanchal today... Gosh! I've never laughed as much as today ever in my life! Freaking crazy!! BTW, I'd like to warn the four of you, that when you're taking the GD and PI of the guy wanting to marry me... you better be damned good at it...! Because if the guy I marry turns out to be a jackass in the end.... I won't leave you alive! I've just given you one responsibility in my entire life...so you better not disappoint me! Rads you have to make sure he's better than him.... Rao you don't have to get any guy from areas like Chinchpockli and Naala Sapara for me or someone Atal Bihari Vajpayee's age for me. LK Advani's age won't do either! I know I'm a big kabab main haddi... but please don't be a sadist! Aanch, I trust you like hell in the PI thing... I'm sure my prospective groom'd come out and tell me, "Your friends, either are big time sadists or they just simply love you to death" after YOU interview him! And Ajay.... you've gotta make sure he has conviction in his voice when he says he loves me (if ever there's a guy who would!!). 

LOST

There's something seriously wrong with me....  No one needs to tell that to me, I can feel it. I haven't had a chocolate since early Feb...still no craving for one...I don't feel like eating one..... not even snatching one from someone.... It's been 4 months since cocoa has gone in my system! What's wrong with me!?! I have stopped talking! WTF! Even a 4 hour hang out with my school best friends....talking about guys (guy problems, to be precise)...and I'm all mute... that's definitely not me.... people are known to wanting to gag me for talking too much, and I sit there....all MUTE? I know, I haven't been coming online, returning calls and messages, let alone make some fresh ones...So sorry to everyone who's been hit by my abnormal behaviour. I really don't know what it is. I actually, don't even want to know. 

 

It's just that I'm feeling too incomplete....too restless. And I'm a content person.... restlessness doesn't go with me just like how love and rationality don't go down together. Incomplete.... just like BSB's song Incomplete....which had been on repeat for 3 months on my WMP in 2006 when life was more or less like how it is right now.... The worst part is that I know how life can be complete  once again.... but I don't it to be complete.... not unless it's perfect. I know, there doesn't exist a perfect in this universe, unless it's maths or physics of course, but I want something that tends to perfectness... it's just 4 conditions to be perfect for me. This ain't asking for too much, is it?

 

Two paragraphs already written making no sense at all. And I don't really care. Sorry, to have bothered you to read this piece of crap! You can go ahead to do things more constructive than reading about someone who's lost herself somewhere!!  

 

P.S: Read the second chapter of my story here.